YaYa Princess

(not the only, but just 10 random )

No, I didn’t DO anything, I just feel like listing this.

1. He puts up w/ my crazy Chantix filled bum and doesn’t let that discourage him.
2. He helps me look for bridesmaid dresses of his own accord
3. NFP on Super Bowl Sunday - ’nuff said
4. That voice he uses when he talks to Stinky or the twins
5. He doesn’t care (realize) that I was all gross and sweaty from working out last night and kissed my nasty forehead anyway when I was sad.
6. His wisdom (but do NOT tell him I said that one)
7. His humility - HA!
8. He does my taxes for FREE-and miraculously I actually get money BACK when he does them!!
9. The silly wave he’ll do just to make me laugh
10. He actually LIKES to cuddle with me-what more can a girl ask for?!

Yesterday I wrote a huge post. At the end I tried to add a photo…and I have no clue what happened but it “weren’t purty”. So rather than re-writing, here’s a quick snapshot.

1.) Friday the boy and I took our “test” for the Catholics. Hopefully we passed Father knows we are living together, and we all just left it at that. He seems to be warming to us, fingers crossed.

2.) Registered this weekend. Night 1 left me wanting a smoky treat, Day 2 left me in tears, Day 3 was Crate and Barrel and I was in heaven Note to self-when going to BBB or any other huge store, just do one room at a time. Very excited to finally register for my Kitchen Aid mixer after 30 years of waiting. Do I think I’ll get it? Hell no. But it’s one of those inside girly jokes.

3.) Still no smoking for us, but the Chantix is killing me

4.) We start Natural Family Planning…on SUPER BOWL SUNDAY! We couldn’t help it-we finally got the list and our options were very limited. The boy must love me.

5.) We also had to sign up for our marriage retreat. All and all, the Catholic portion of this wedding will cost in excess of $1,000. Who knew the Bank of Catholics was so fruitful. Sheesh.

6.) J is a wiz online, and I heart sweatshops :)-

From my friends that is.

Yesterday afternoon I wanted out of this office. Normally that would be a smoky treat, but no more. I hadn’t see J in days, so I shot her a message to see if she wanted to head over to Starbucks for a break. I told her she could feel free to take a “break”, that it wouldn’t bother me.

We met up and walked over chatting as usual. I had gotten it in my head that I wanted an Arnold Palmer - basically lemonade and iced tea mixed. I gave my order and the guy asks me “what kind of tea?”. What kind??? I don’t know-I usually only drink tea if I’m sick or drinking an AP, how the heck should I know what kind of tea?

So I say “I don’t know-passion fruit? Whatever you would normally put in it”. So I pay, and we wait until I see this hot-pinkish drink that the barista guy says is mine. I take one sip and I can feel it-I’m about to loose my mind. All I wanted was this drink, well, this drink and a freakin’ cigarette, and the only one I can have is not what I want.

I think I started babbling “this isn’t right, this isn’t right” over and over again. In my head I kept thinking - this tastes like bark - which is my description of tea when I’m not in the mood for it. I can feel a three year old-esque temper tantrum coming on. OMG SOMEONE GIVE ME MY DRINK!

And that’s when it happens. All of the sudden, J swoops in and takes my drink from my trembling hand. With steel-like calmness she says something to the Starbucks guy (who is obviously in fear of me at this point) to the effect of “I need you to remake this drink with Black tea please, as quickly as possible”. (so I don’t remember word for word, but this was high-drama to me so go with it) 30 seconds later a fresh, more normal looking drink is gently placed upon my grasp and I take a sip.

THANK YOU BABY JESUS. It was what I wanted, and all was good with the world. Before we left we did explain the whole ‘nic fit’ issue and the guy laughed. I guess it’s good to have someone who is an expert in dealing w/ three-year-old temper tantrums around when the coffee experience goes bad

We walked back chatting as normal when I realized J never did take her break. Honestly, it really wouldn’t have bothered me. But it was so considerate of her. Did she take one after I walked into my building? Probably-h*ll HOPEFULLY But it’s just one more way in which my friends rock.

And not just to J, but to all my friends a big thank you. I won’t lie, this whole thing sucks. And of course I decided we should do this before the wedding…just like taking the CMP before summer conf. I’m a glutten for punishment.

Relax-I haven’t had a ciggie. No, this is a wedding confession.

Those closest to me know about a recurring dream I have in regards to my wedding. It started years and years ago, and though it’s slightly different every time, there are some general themes. Here’s how it goes:

It’s the day of my wedding. I’m standing in the back of the church with my mom or dad or someone, and I realize suddenly-hey, it’s my wedding day!-except that it’s almost like I was completely unaware that it was coming. I’m standing there in a dress, but not one I love. I realize I haven’t done anything-gotten a mani/pedi, gotten flowers or a photographer etc. Those are always the first things on my mind. Then I realize that I don’t really know the guy I’m about to marry.

There are a lot of more complexities to the dream I won’t share here. The point is this though-even though I obviously know the boy, I sometimes feel like I’m just floating through this. Trying to deal with the stress of quitting smoking isn’t helping. There’s so much to do, and though we’re getting a lot done, I can’t quit help but feel like at times I’m approaching it much more like a job than MY WEDDING.

I know I haven’t really started getting into the fine details lately-my favorite part-but at the same time I think I’m a little overwhelmed by it all. And add to that I don’t do well with the online shopping-so many sites and I really like to see tangible things. I mean-there are SOOO many wedding ideas, I don’t want to skimp miss something that I almost feel like a deer in the headlights. Like today I heard about toilet paper w/ your initials-you know, like the napkins but on TP. Where have I been that I didn’t think of this?? Ok, not that that’s THE greatest idea, but it’s freakin’ funny. It’s my wedding, I feel lots of pressure to really make this “us”. And I could use a smoky treat, but no, I will not.

Someone tell me this will pass and I’ll feel like my wedidng isn’t just some random job…

Last night after we blogged and then ate dinner, the boy and I were hurting. We ended up running to the store for a movie and a “snack”. I must admit I drank about a liter of Coke and ate a good 3/4’s of a quart of ice cream….it was ugly but we made it.

Today is my first day at work, and it’s much much harder than yesterday. This morning we had our Monday meeting (even though it’s Tuesday) after which I usually go outside w/ K. Today after the meeting, I was so distraught at being ’stuck’ in here I almost cried. I kept finding myself standing up and having to remember I was going no where.

I’ve just finished lunch, and promptly stuck a lollipop in my mouth. Much like an infant, I know now not to wait to stick the pacifier in when they start fussing-just do it straight away.

There’s not much in other news. I’m trying to concentrate and get some work done but I will freely admit to not being very productive today. And so it goes.