YaYa Princess

As you can probably tell from my lack of exceptional post title, I’m still in a little bit of a funk.  Ok, a lot of one.  This was so NOT helped this morning dealing w/ a woman who I am sure thinks I’m a moron and I’m doing everything I can to A.) be helpful B.) prove I’m not and oh yea, C.) not scream at her in “creative terms”.  God help me w/ C.

But, like it or not it’s a new day and I’m still here.  Trying to look at the bright side, and getting super excited about Buffet on Thurs.  It’s hard to get motivated when your week is so chopped up w/ meetings and you know you get two days off coming to you :) 

I wish I could be more positive.  J is so good about that.  I wish I didn’t feel like there was such a cloud right now.  I miss the ole light at the end of a tunnel from doing more seasonal/cyclical work.  So I shall fake it till I make it.  Or, just get really drunk on our Ha.wiian P.unch/M.alibu Ru.m combo

We took She She to the airport yesterday.  It was a great weekend and a great visit.  Before we went to the airport we spent the day at open houses (relax, we’re just getting our pinky toes wet that’s all….no house buying in the near future).  We did see one kinda cool, kinda B.lair W.itch house in which M. Kn.ight Sh.amalade was the relator

Having her here, having here so near-it was so comforting.  Thursday morning before work I couldn’t put my finger on it right away, but then I realized.  It was peace and safety.  There’s something lovely about knowing that mom (even if she isn’t mine) is close by.  There are times when I’m glad I’m out and away from my family, standing on my own, proving myself that I can do this thing called life.  But more and more now I find myself jelous of those that have family close, that can simply call up and decide to have dinner together, that don’t have a job that require a major city or have families who live in wonderful small towns or who don’t have a complex about having said job. 

I’m rambling, I know.

After we dropped Sheshers off we drove by one more neighborhood.  Maybe it was b/c its was Sunday, maybe it was b/c I was starving, but out of no where I just said “I miss She She” and began to tear up (not good when you’re the one driving). 

I began to realize something though this weekend.  Remember how in high school all you wanted was to be popular, to be in the “in” crowd?  Hell, I don’t think that really ever goes away.  But what happens when you find yourself as an adult in that place that your career that you always wanted to be,  with the firm you always wanted to be with, with the schedule that is so insane you thought somehow would prove your worth,  that it was so right there you could taste it in your mouth.

And then you realize that while you aren’t unhappy, maybe what you want isn’t really so grand?  Maybe it’s quite simple really.  Maybe you just needed to prove to yourself you could do it.  And maybe, just maybe, you need to get over ‘yourself’ enough so you can enjoy the simplier things in life. 

In the meantime, I’m here and I’ll do whatever I can to enjoy the ride.

I will admit, I’ve been a bit cranky lately.  It’s that time of year again, and yet I’m not going to CA which is throwing me.  Not to mention I’m still trying to get a hold of the whole “pacing” myself with this new job.  It’s coming, but not w/o some growing pains (and in at least one case some thrown utensils). 

Last night on my rampage the boy played me this song, but in my defense I didn’t know it was being played for me.  Anyway, later when I calmed down he played it again for me-Trouble by Ray Lamontagne.  Hopefully I’ll figure out how to stick it up here.  I had half heard it the first time and liked it well enough. 

I turned to the boy and asked “dance with me?”  Now usually the men in my life just laugh and turn back to what they’re doing.  I mean, let’s face it it kinda does seem silly to dance in one’s living room.  But instead he got a big smile on his face, and said that he in fact thought that was a great idea. 

And so we danced, in the space where a table should be that turns out to be a great little dance floor.  And in the middle of all of this I discovered the actual lyrics… 

Trouble, Saved by a Woman.

This week was Springtime-no, not the season, the event.  Springtime is an annual tradeshow for meeting and event planners-probably one of the biggest of our year.  http://www.springtimeexpo.com/attendee_home.cfm

Springtime, I would say, is only rivleved in parties and visits to Christmas (yea, that’s right I said Christmas not “the holidays”…not feeling very PC today).  Since all these different industry folks are coming into town, they try to make appointments.  And the parties…dear God.  Last year I went to two different Galas.  This year, b/c I’m at a new job and people don’t realize where I am yet I didn’t get the mass invites to receptions.  To be honest, I’m fine w/ this.   After coming off of a worldwind May I didn’t really feel like getting my “jiggy” on.  And to be even more honest, sometimes the schmoozing makes me naceous. 

Today I had my last appt (sepearte from Springtime really) and now I’m done.  Whew.  Time to get cracking though on my next 3 meetings-thankfully spread out.  Plus, She She comes on Wed and I’m super excited.  I still have to figure out what to do w/ Stinky’s litter box though, and at the moment it looks like I’ll just be in the guest bathroom twice a day cleaning up…not really sure where else it can go (sorry She She).  It’s funny now that a year has past and I can look back on “last year at this time”.  Last year at this time is when I first met She She, awwwe I hear Bab’s “Memories” coming on :) 

update below

What’s that sound?  Why the sound of my hard earned money being flushed away of course!  I took Lola into the Jeep place this morning-you know, my “perfect” car???  Yea, right now we’re looking at $1700.00.  Yes my friends, that’s 2 sets of zeros.  I just called my salesman-I’m pretty ticked seeing as they did know about the brakepads/roaters (PS-I thought I took it in for the AC??).  Fingers crossed, though I don’t know if it really matters anymore.  One day I’d like to buy a home w/ the boy…but obviously that’s not coming soon w/ the way I’m getting money sucked outta me.

Can you say bitter?

 Update

There are times when you just need to learn to call it a day.  That’s my day today.  3 hours ago I went to get something to drink for lunch.  Then I got the call about Lola.  Then I spent 1 hour on the phone w/ our travel agency b/c their computer program  SUCKS.  Then I find out (and I apologize but I have to be cryptic) that this piece of business that I really worked hard on in a round about way I can’t even work on b/c of my schedule next year, which is understandable but completely dissapointing.  And now, now I”m finally eating lunch.

The one upside as I write this is my sales manager just called back and he has a call into the service people to try to get me a discount.  The weird thing is he says that as long as my brakes WHICH ARE METAL ON METAL aren’t squeeling or having trouble stopping that I shouldnt’ bother fixing them until inspection time.  Sorry, but I don’t want to die in a firey crash-thanks anyway.  5pm can’t come soon enough-I’m opening some wine tonight.